Billboard Chart Review-2/28/13

This week's chart dated March 9, 2013 actually reflects the sales week of February 18-February 24.

The Billboard Hot 100:
Song                                        Position           Last Week
Harlem Shake                          1                      1          *Digital Gainer*
Thrift Shop                              2                      2
When I was your man             3                      8          *Airplay Gainer*
I knew you were trouble         4                      5
Scream & Shout                      5                      4
Started from the bottom          6                     10
Stay                                         7                      3
Suit and Tie                             8                      9
Locked out of heaven             9                      7
Love Me                                  10                    19        *Pacesetter*
Obviously, "Harlem Shake" has not died down, as the thousands of videos of the dance garnered 98 million views last week. I still don't think they should all count, but like it or not, it's a viral phenomenon and we're just gonna have to let it take its course. At least it's gaining in sales, but still not as much as "Thrift Shop". That song continues to gain in airplay and it posts a seventh straight week of 300,000+ copies sold. It's technically more qualified to be number one, but Nielsen YouTube scans continue to tell us otherwise. "Love Me" is the new top ten entry, and it's a Lil Wayne song...wow, totally didn't see that one coming. Anyway, a look at what's happening outside of the top ten: "Ho Hey" drops 6-11, One Direction scores their second top twenty hit as "One Way or Another" shoots 45-13, Rihanna inches 22-21 with "Pour it Up", Fun's "Some Nights" falls 28-38 in its 53rd chart week, absent from the chart is Gotye and Kimbra's "Somebody That I Used to Know", Adele's "Skyfall" is gaining from its Oscar win and it rises 83-61, Pink's duet with Nate Ruess "Just Give Me a Reason" bullets 84-72, Ellie Goulding's "Anything Could Happen" is thankfully still on the chart, but it falls 85-94 in its 20th week, and yeah, that's about it.

The Billboard 200:
Album                                     Position           Last Week
Babel                                       1                      1
Unorthodox Jukebox              2                      3
All That Echoes                      3                      5
Now 45                                   4                      8
The Lumineers                        5                      6
Boys and Girls                        6                      20
2013 Grammy Nominees        7                      2
Some Nights                           8                      7
Unapologetic                           9                      15
Red                                         10                    4
Now that the Grammy-boosted sales are over, we're back to a mundane week. Actually, this week posts the most uneventful album sales in over six months. "Babel" keeps number one on the strength of 63,000 copies, and since the best selling album sold less than 100,000 copies, there wasn't much competition for the top. The only albums that posted a gain in sales were Rihanna's "Unapologetic" and Alabama Shakes' "Boys and Girls". But let's see if the rest of the chart brought excitement:
The "Pitch Perfect" soundtrack rises 16-11, Adele's "21" shoots 19-14 in its 105th chart week, Macklemore's "The Heist" bullets 33-16, Alicia Keys' "Girl on Fire" rockets 28-18, Usher's 2004 blockbuster "Confessions" makes a surprise comeback as it vaults 199-114, and is the pacesetter of the week, and taking the biggest plunge is Gotye's "Making Mirrors" as it plummets 80-181. The album with the most weeks on the chart right now is, surprise, Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon", it falls 143-195 in its 824th week.

Billboard and YouTube

Ok, so if you haven't heard by now that "Harlem Shake" is now number one on the Billboard Hot 100, well, now you do. If you also haven't heard that Billboard is now factoring YouTube views into their weekly charts, well, now you know that as well. Before, the Hot 100 based their charts on airplay and sales, that's it. But since we're in the digital era, online streaming has reached an all time high, so now people get their music off of iTunes, Spotify, Pandora, Sirius, and yes, especially YouTube. That's how the public consumes music now, it's something I've come to terms with a long time ago. But with this recent development in the Billboard charts I've been trying to form my opinion on their decision to allow YouTube views into their charting methods. Well, if we look at why they did it, you'll realize that radio and single sales are not enough to dictate the popularity of a song anymore. Let's face it, why buy a song or wait forever to hear it on the radio when you can listen to it instantly on YouTube for free? That's just the way the consumption of music works in 2013, I get it, but there's also a few problems I have with "Harlem Shake" being number one just because of its online views.

First off, Billboard explained that the song became number one because of 103 million views from the week of February 11-February 17. Really? The original music video for "Harlem Shake" got 103 million views in that week? Uh, no, it didn't. The original video has about 5.5 million views total. So, if you haven't figured it out by now, that means that Billboard took into account all of the 40,000+ thirty second videos of people dancing to the song, and then counted it as one play/view of the song. I'm sorry, but a 30-second video of a song shouldn't count towards a view for the song itself. The whole song wasn't played, in fact it wasn't even listened to, people just like watching other people flail their arms about. And before I go any further, you do realize that an official music video for Harlem Shake hasn't even been made yet, right? Some random YouTuber decided to make a dance with that song in the background, people liked it and then their monkey see monkey do senses kicked in and then they did their own versions so then they could get their fifteen minutes of fame. The song and the dance are only related because of that one guy, Baauer didn't come up with it, so in all honesty he shouldn't be the one credited for its immense populartity. I'm sorry if that pissed you off, but Harlem Shake, the song, is not what's really popular right now, it's Harlem Shake, the dance. Last time I checked, a dance is not a song. And unlike "The Macarena" and "Gangnam Style", the dance was not created by the original artist of the song. Los Del Rio made the dance to their own song, as did Psy, so they were given proper credit because they created it. The Harlem Shake is nothing more than another dance fad that will obviously wither away in a month or so when yet another YouTuber makes a fool of themselves in their thirst for the spotlight. Sorry Baauer, but "Harlem Shake" is not the most popular song in America right now, I'm not even sure if people know all the lyrics to it. And as for Billboard, I'm perfectly fine with YouTube views counting towards the Hot 100, it makes sense since that is a perfect representation of what songs are the most popular, but a 30-second video of a dance is not a song, and it should not be counted as such. And if you look at the other components that contributed to Harlem Shake's number one debut: it did not receive any significant airplay, and it has sold only 260,000 copies...that's it. That hardly qualifies it to be number one.

Before you start saying "Hey, there have been many songs that suck but have still reached number one!", remember the key word is song, not dance. I'm treating Harlem Shake as its own individual case because as I've said before, it only got to number one because of 30-second clips, while all the other songs on the chart had to be fully listened to in order to get a view that counted towards its chart position. But in the end, Harlem Shake isn't the worst number one the Hot 100 has ever had, not by a long shot. I made a post earlier about crappy number ones, but here's a little recap of songs "quality" and "genius" songs that took the coveted top slot:
Flo Rida-Whistle (#1 for 2 weeks)
Lil Wayne and Static Major-Lollipop (#1 for 5 weeks)
Wiz Khalifa-Black and Yellow (#1 for 1 week)
Soulja Boy-Crank That (#1 for 7 weeks...seven??!!)
Beyonce-Single Ladies (#1 for 4 weeks)
Rihanna and Drake-What's My Name? (#1 for 1 week)
The Black Eyed Peas-Boom Boom Pow (#1 for 12 weeks. TWELVE!)

So yeah, the Hot 100 has been going downhill ever since the year 2000 reared its ugly head, the fact that Harlem Shake is now number one isn't all that terrifying. It's just how it got to be number one that's frustrating. That is the world we live in now, and in actuality, the Hot 100 will be more accurate than ever because it can now fully represent how popular a song is, you wouldn't click on the music video if you weren't interested in the song, now would you? No you would not, the fact that YouTube views now count towards the Billboard's rankings is your fault, not theirs. I just hope that they monitor what counts as a "view" better in the future. But just to recap: Harlem Shake is the most popular video people dancing in America right now, it is not the most popular song.

Madonna-"Like a Prayer" Review

All Madonna really wanted was to be treated as a serious artist, who knew? Surely her ever exposed navel and her “Like a Virgin” persona wouldn’t have suggested as such, but no, Madonna is a serious, and more importantly, talented, artist. And it’s not just a proclamation, she insists on it, so much to the point of ditching the shallow values of her early 80s persona and thickens her vocals, adds the funk, brings in the choir, and starts to fully broaden her stylistic range. She was edging away from the disco flavors of her debut before, but “Like a Prayer” completely shatters the mold she dug herself in. The starting guitar riff in the title track is a clear statement that Madonna is much more serious than she led us to believe. She rejects the idea that love can be bought in “Express Yourself” (huh?), she includes the exquisite piano ballad “Promise to Try” (huh?!), and she brings in Prince in “Love Song” which proves she can work with other artists and still make the duet her own (what?!). From start to finish, “Like a Prayer” holds Madonna’s most consistent and accomplished music. In 1989, as the teen-dance pop craze comes to a fizzle, she rides this wave and delivers exactly what the times need: a bold, artistic statement that provides breadth for mainstream music. Also, in her conquest to prove her vocal talent, she delivers the first album that’s closer to an actual artform. “Like a Prayer” is structured very much like a work of art, filled with different colors, genres, and moods. It all comes in a rush of brilliance, found prominently in “Like a Prayer”, “Cherish”, and “Dear Jessie”, the latter of which contains a string arrangement that was pulled right out of the classical era. And while this album definitely has its lows, mostly the closer “Act of Contrition” and that fore-mentioned Prince duet, overall, “Like a Prayer” overcomes its struggles and ultimately proves that when it comes to art filled and meaningful pop, nobody can do it better than Madonna.

Recommended Tracks in Bold:

1. Like a Prayer                     2. Express Yourself    3. Love Song

4. Till Death Do Us Part          5. Promise to Try      6. Cherish

7. Dear Jessie                        8. Oh Father               9. Keep it Together

10. Spanish Eyes                    11. Act of Contrition    

Billboard Chart Review-2/21/13

Okay, there's been a new development. Billboard has now started to include YouTube views in their methodology for the Hot 100. So now a song's performance is based on: sales (both physical and digital), airplay, and views on YouTube. I'm not quite sure how I feel about this yet, because that might turn into every viral sensation becoming a number one hit. And in fact, that very thing happened this week. So, this week's chart dated March 2, 2013 actually reflects the sales week from February 11-February 17.

The Billboard Hot 100:
Song                                        Position           Last Week
Harlem Shake                          1                      -
Thrift Shop                              2                      1
Stay                                         3                      57        *Digital Gainer*
Scream & Shout                      4                      3         
I knew you were trouble         5                      5
Ho Hey                                   6                      4
Locked out of Heaven            7                      2
When I was your man             8                      9
Suit and Tie                             9                      8
Started from the bottom         10                    63
As you can see, Baauer's "Harlem Shake" viral phenomenon has become the 21st song to debut at number one, and it is all due to its views on YouTube. It has not received any substantial airplay, and it has just been released to digital retailers. I'm not really sure I like this because now a song doesn't have to work to become a hit, it just has to contain some dance or some other distinctive thing in its music video it now can rise to the top, with no airplay or significant sales. In fact, "Thrift Shop" would have been number one still if it had received the large amount of YouTube attention that "Harlem Shake" did. "Thrift" sold 412,000 copies this week, more than any other song, and it received 111 million audience impressions, up from last week. But, Billboard has decided to include video views so, it's a new change we'll have to accept. This really did shake things up this week. That's why Rihanna's "Stay" has also blasted into the top ten, its music video debuted this week and all of her videos received 100 million views or more. "Scream and Shout" through "Suit and Tie" suffer from the YouTube views, since their music videos have not received a significant increase in the past week. Drake's new song "Started from the Bottom", well, I've never heard it, but he has a reputation of making large leaps when a new song comes out. So, now let's see how the new methodology affected the rest of the Hot 100: Mumford and Sons rise 15-12 with "I Will Wait", Fun rises 43-20 with "Carry On", Rihanna also lunges 34-22 with "Pour it Up", Justin Timberlake's "Mirrors" debuts at number 24, Psy rebounds 48-26 with "Gangnam Style" (and yes, the fact that it's the most watched video on YouTube helped make this sudden turn around), Fun's "Some Nights" becomes the 32nd song to spend a year on the Hot 100 and it falls 24-28, Ke$ha falls 29-35 with "C'Mon", and a rebound isn't looking plausible, Gotye and Kimbra bullet 42-36 with "Somebody That I Used to Know" in its 59th chart week, so it looks like its two Grammy wins and music video have re-interested listeners a bit, One Direction rises 72-51 with "Kiss You", and Pink's duet with Nate Ruess "Just Give Me a Reason" debuts at number 84 this week.

The Billboard 200:
Album                                     Position           Last Week
Babel                                       1                      4
2013 Grammy Nominees        2                      11
Unorthodox Jukebox              3                      8
Red                                         4                      12
All That Echoes                      5                      1
The Lumineers                        6                      10
Some Nights                           7                      14
Now 45                                   8                      3
Passione                                  9                      5
Overexposed                           10                    20
YouTube views will never have an effect on album sales, but that doesn't mean we didn't see some excitement this week. The week after the Grammys has now been accounted for, and a staggering eighteen albums in the top forty have seen some significant gain in sales. However, this week's number one, the Grammy-winning "Babel" sold only 180,000 copies, WAY down from last year's Grammy-winning number one "21", which sold 730,000 copies. In fact, album sales haven't been so hot in 2013. The total number of albums sold to date this year is down 6% compared to the sum of this point in 2012. Anyway, the Grammy Nominees compilation makes an expected leap into the top ten, as it does every year. Bruno Mars, Taylor Swift, The Lumineers, Fun, and Maroon 5 all benefit from their award wins and performances. So, let's see how the Grammys affected other albums:
Pink rises 23-11 with "The Truth About Love", The Black Keys rise 29-14 with "El Camino", Rihanna inches 17-15 with "Unapologetic", Hunter Hayes shoots 27-17 with "Wanted", Adele's "21" zooms 22-19 in its 104th chart week (and it has yet to chart lower than number 35), Alabama Shakes rises 43-20 with "Boys and Girls", Carrie Underwood rises 41-27 with "Blown Away", Alicia Keys is up 33-28 with "Girl on Fire", Miguel's "Kaleidoscope Dream" bullets 58-39, Zac Brown Band rockets 69-41 with "Uncaged", Frank Ocean increases 46-42 with "Channel Orange", "Journey's Greatest Hits" is our PaceSetter and it blasts 139-46, Zac Brown Band's "The Foundation" also blasts 156-50, Florence + The Machine's "Ceremonials" shoots 91-52, Jack White's "Blunderbuss" vaults 95-54, Kelly Clarkson's Grammy winning "Stronger" sees another gain from 128-70, and taking the biggest plunge this week is Richard Thompson's album "Electric" as it falls 75-198.

So excitment has finally come to the charts, and about time too.

Kelly Clarkson-"Thankful" Review

Watching American Idol's first season in 2002 was about as awkward as it could possibly be. The first time jitters from both the contestants and judges positioned the show to be as un-cool as well, the Andy Williams show  back in the 70s. And then what to make of the winner's  success after the show? Since it was the first season, its winner Kelly Clarkson was given the daunting task of not only proving the show really can produce pop stars, but that it also is a credible way to super stardom. This is the main reason for her much delayed debut album, finally arriving after seven months since the finale. Coming off the hype of her coronation song "A Moment Like This", it may have broken a record, but it still did not offer any viable career paths as it felt restrained, and just like the entire show, awkward.

So, in order to avoid ending Kelly Clarkson's career before it even began, her management decided to properly think and calculate her first full-length album. With two new mixes of "A Moment Like This" and "Before Your Love", it's instantly clear that this was a smart move. Since Kelly was largely absent in the audition process, "Thankful" basically follows in those footsteps as the second season was already nearing its end. Also smart was to essentially re-work Clarkson into an adult-contemporary sound that suited both her considerable pipes and endearing personality. All of that made for splendid entertainment on TV, and it audibly works just as well. Starting the album with "The Trouble With Love Is", a track reminiscent of Christina Aguilera's debut, it seems that both Kelly and her management have crafted a set that offers exactly what it should to make her a star. Her voice is lush -- the songwriting is strong -- the production is immaculate -- and the dance numbers are just as catchy as the laid back show-stoppers. True, it's nothing that will completely shake the mainstream of 2003, but it's still something special. As other veteran artists made a shift towards dance-pop and the Avril-frontiered punk-pop, "Thankful" stays true to Kelly's musical style and offers no gimmicks, even if her way to fame was very much that. But what also makes this album work is that Kelly Clarkson truly is a star, from the moment she took the judge's seat in her audition and through the entire season of phenomenal performances that saved her from both the bottom two and three, everybody was rooting for her. She's young, yet matured, she's fresh, and she's exactly what the times were crying for: a drop dead gorgeous brunette that was both visually stunning and with a vocal talent to match. And while she may be cleaned up and a tad bit faceless here, "Thankful" is still an impressive debut from a star who didn't seem like the perfect candidate for the AmIdol win, even though it is honor that she clearly deserved. This album was definitely over-worked to ensure its cross-culture appeal, but most of the time it works. "Miss Independent" is a sassy little pop tune, "Low" is an effortless and airy rock ballad, "Beautiful Disaster" uses angelic dance-pop to sink its hook, and her collaboration with fellow Idol contestant Tamyra Gray is worked exactly the right way to showcase their voices. And no one could deny the sheer power of the new mixes at the end, featuring glory notes unseen since Christina Aguilera's 2002 masterpiece "Stripped". "Thankful" may play a little long, regardless of its twelve track length, but it's still a breath of fresh air, and a reassurance that Kelly Clarkson is a true American Idol.

Recommended Tracks in Bold:
1. The Trouble With Love Is               2. Miss Independent  3. Low
4. Some Kind of Miracle        5. What’s Up Lonelty?           6. Just Missed the Train
7. Beautiful Disaster              8. You Thought Wrong           9. Thankful
10. Anytime                            11. A Moment Like This       12. Before Your Love

Madonna-"American Life" Review

According to Madonna, the “American Life” of materialism and soy lattes isn’t for her, even though her “Material Girl” days that made her a star say otherwise. Still, she has abandoned the US for the UK hoping to seek a life not focused on wars, celebrities, and insignificant things. So, what is “American Life” in the end? Is it an album meant for social commentary, or is it just one part in Madonna’s quest for musical and spiritual enlightenment? After two albums into her Kabbalah conquest, it would seem that she’s trying to accomplish both at once. She opens the album with the title track that poses the question “Do I have to change my name? Will it get me far?”, and then she goes right into “Hollywood”, a staid acoustic track that features an odd voice alteration towards its ending that exclaims “push the button, don’t push the button, trip the station, change the channel!” With these awkward tracks setting up the album, it doesn’t get much more interesting from there, as a tooth drilling opening to “I’m So Stupid” and a gospel choir in the middle of “Nothing Fails” only pile things on and make the first half of the record seem tiring. Even though it contains “Love Profusion”, another acoustic driven ballad that undeniably works, its surrounding material clutters the mind with too many different messages of the American ways, the obsession of Hollywood, and direct confessional love songs to Guy Ritchie. The stretch from “Nothing Fails” to the wonderful “X-Static Process” can actually be quite compelling, but it can be quite hard to get there after listening to Madonna at once recycle her old material, and then reject the new material she herself wanted to use. And perhaps her stabs at politics would have worked if she was fully committed to them, but what ultimately becomes this album’s undoing is the undercurrent of dissatisfaction. It’s almost as if “American Life” was a project that Madonna felt forced to do, and this is her airing her dirty laundry because of it. There’s nothing wrong with self-expression, Madonna doesn’t benefit from her over-use of producer Mirwais Ahmadzai, and instead of making a serious statement she undermines her own cause with calculated rapping and exhausting hip-hop beats, resulting in sounding whiny instead of serious. And that’s a rare thing in a Madonna album, where she cannot even fulfill her own ambition. As the album closes with its nadir, the James Bond theme “Die Another Day” and the slow, boring “Easy Ride”, it seems to put the final nail in the coffin Madonna has built for herself. It’s obvious to tell she’s no longer interested in the modern day American dream, but coming from a pop mastermind with now twenty years in the business, she was capable of so much more than this. Although it would have been hypocritical to do so, she very well could have made a stellar track bashing the America of today if she had fully invested herself, and she also would have benefitted from deciding on a certain direction. She tries dance, hip-hop, string driven ballads and most often intimate guitar pieces, but ends up not doing complete justice to any sound. All in all, that makes “American Life” to be a frustrating mix of mediocre and sensational, and proves that while the ideas were definitely viable, in 2003 they are out of place, and “American Life” is a better thought than an album.

Recommended Tracks in Bold:

1. American Life        2. Hollywood                         3. I’m So Stupid

4. Love Profusion     5. Nobody Knows Me             6. Nothing Fails

7. Intervention             8. X-Static Process               9. Mother and Father

10. Die Another Day   11. Easy Ride

Billboard Chart Review-2/14/13

Before I start, I'll say that I made an error in telling you when Billboard's sales tracking week starts and ends. It actually goes from Monday to Sunday, so I've been distorting exactly which days are being counted into which sales weeks. This week's chart, dated February 23, actually reflects the sales week of Monday, February 4 through Sunday, February 10.

The Billboard Hot 100:
Song                                        Position           Last Week
Thrift Shop                              1                      1
Locked Out of Heaven            2                      2
Scream & Shout                      3                      3
Ho Hey                                    4                      4
I Knew You Were Trouble     5                      5
Don’t You Worry Child         6                       6
Daylight                                  7                      14
Suit and Tie                             8                      13
When I Was Your Man           9                      22
Beauty and a Beat                  10                     7
So there's this little thing called The Grammys, and it has a drastic effect on sales this time of year. That's why "Suit and Tie", "Daylight" (ew), and "When I Was Your Man" have all entered the top ten, all three artists performed those songs (or their previous hits) on the Grammy stage and this caused a major boost in sales for their music. Also, there's a general re-interest that the Grammys have on other titles as well, which explains why the whole first six songs kept their ranks from last week. So, that explains the top ten, let's see what songs just missed out: Alicia Keys keeps 12-12 with "Girl on Fire", Pink falls 9-13 with "Try", Calvin and Florence fall 10-14 with "Sweet Nothing" (whether or not those titles will re-enter the top ten is unknown, since the Grammys were on a Sunday, the end of the sales tracking week, a full week of boosted sales has not been accounted for yet). Mumford and Sons bullet 26-15 with "I Will Wait", its highest rank yet, Ed Sheeran rebounds 23-20 with "The A Team", Fun's "Some Nights" holds 24-24 in its 51st chart week, Ke$ha falls 27-29 with "C'Mon", Gotye and Kimbra shoot 47-42 with "Somebody That I Used to Know" in its 58th chart week (the fact that the song won Record of the Year explains this feat), Fun rockets 65-43 with "Carry On", and Rihanna debuts at number 57 with "Stay".

The Billboard 200:
Album                                     Position           Last Week
All That Echoes                      1                      -
Two Lanes of Freedom           2                      -
Now 45                                   3                      -
Babel                                       4                      7
Passione                                  5                      2
Believe Acoustic                     6                      1
Release the Panic                    7                      -
Unorthodox Jukebox              8                      6
The Afterman: Descension     9                      -
The Lumineers                        10                    9
The Grammys have not been so kind to album sales just yet, as the majority of last week's sales came before Sunday. Although, Grammy nominations also have an effect on re-booting interest in the albums. Josh Groban beats out the competition this week as "All That Echoes" benefits from a massive amount of pre-orders. Tim McGraw and the 45th "Now That's What I Call Music" compilation score top ten debuts as well. Mumford and Sons obviously rise 7-4 with "Babel" because it was nominated for Album of the Year (and it subsequently won this category), and early sales reports say that the album is sure to ascend to number one come next week. And yeah, not too interested in the rest of the top ten, so let's see which albums are also on the rise:
Fun bullets 25-14 with "Some Nights", Rihanna inches 19-17 with "Unapologetic", Maroon 5 rises 32-20 with "Overexposed", Pink's "The Truth About Love" climbs 29-23, Alabama Shakes rockeets 79-43 with "Boys and Girls", Frank Ocean rises 85-46 with "Channel Orange", Eminem is our pacesetter this week as "Recovery" zooms 170-72, Florence + The Machine rises 119-71 with "Ceremonials", Jack White's "Blunderbuss" rises 143-95, Taylor Swift's "Speak Now" bullets 194-115, and Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger" benefits from its Best Pop Vocal Album nomination (and subsequent win) and rises 180-128. Next week we'll see a full Grammy sales impact, and also notable is that sales are now picking up, making the charts alot more interesting than before.

The 75 Best Selling Artists of All Time

So far!! Once again, this list will change as more artists come out with more stuff, but as of 2013, these are the artists that have sold the most records worldwide. Records meaning both albums and single sales combined. Number 75 has sold 76 million records worldwide, while number 1 has sold over 600 million records worldwide. Ok, here you go:

75. The Black Eyed Peas
74. New Kids on the Block
73. Tom Petty
72. Barry Manilow
71. Meat Loaf
70. Reba McEntire
69. The Doors
68. Foreigner
67. Red Hot Chilli Peppers
66. Van Halen
65. Shania Twain
64. B'z
63. REM
62. Gloria Estefan
61. Santana
60. Barry White
59. Johnny Hallyday
58. The Who
57. Kiss
56. The Beach Boys
55. Stevie Wonder
54. Tina Turner
53. Linda Ronstadt
52. Olivia Newton-John
51. Lionel Richie
50. Cher
49. Bryan Adams
48. Bob Dylan
47. Def Leppard
46. George Michael
45. The Carpenters
44. Chicago
43. Janet Jackson
42. Kenny Rogers
41. Paul McCartney
40. Prince
39. Guns N Roses
38. Backstreet Boys
37. Rod Stewart
36. Fleetwood Mac
35. Bon Jovi
34. Britney Spears
33. Eminem
32. Metallica
31. Eminem
30. Taylor Swift
29. Dire Straits
28. Julio Iglesias
27. Bee Gees
26. Bruce Springsteen
25. Neil Diamond
24. Donna Summer
23. Genesis
22. Garth Brooks
21. Barbra Streisand
20. Frank Sinatra
19. Aerosmith
18. Phil Collins
17. Billy Joel
16. U2
15. Eagles
14. ABBA
13. Queen
12. The Rolling Stones
11. AC/DC
10. Whitney Houston
9. Celine Dion
8. Mariah Carey
7. Pink Floyd
6. Elton John
5. Led Zeppelin
4. Madonna
3. Michael Jackson
2. Elvis Presley
1. The Beatles

In Defense of fun. and Gotye

So, with Maroon 5 out of my system, I'll now address the backlash to fun. and Gotye winning Grammys on Sunday.

Here's my first question: Why?! Why are people so pissed off that they won Record of the Year and Best New Artist? Is it because they're indie? Seriously, what merit do people have for hating these artists? I don't know, but I'll address some reasons that a couple people have told me.

fun.
So, fun. is an indie-rock group that made it big with "We Are Young" last year. Probably the most over-played song of 2012, their presence was inescapable. And they so far have proved to not be a one-hit wonder as "Some Nights" has also received considerable airplay. Now their third single "Carry On" is rapidly climbing the charts, not too shabby for a new artist. So yeah, I'm sorry, but all of those things give fun. grounds to win Best New Artist. They were by far the most popular group; yeah Frank Ocean was critically acclaimed, but he wasn't that successful as far as popularity goes. Also, Alabama Shakes is a country group that only appeals to one audience, Hunter Hayes is just another teen heartthrob (though he is kind of talented), and The Lumineers only have one hit song (and their debut album didn't sell extremely well). So yeah, fun. was the clear winner here, sorry. They've had two top three hits and their album has sold more than any of those previously mentioned names. That's why they won, they're the most popular, and in all actuality, they are rather talented.
But that's apparently not the public opinion anymore, now people hate fun. because:

Nate Ruess has an annoying girly voice
Really? I'm sorry, this is no reason to hate fun. Why? because Adam Levine, Justin Timberlake, and Justin Bieber all have voices extremely higher than Nate's, and they actually get really annoying after a couple plays. Plus, when Nate goes up into the falsetto notes, he doesn't sound like a girl, he sounds like a guy who is talented enough to belt out those glory tones. How is his voice annoying? I just don't understand it at all. And really, his voice is not that high.

They're not in it for the music, they're in it for the money. And they're not artistic
Ok this reason is really a piece of garbage. You're actually telling me that fun. an indie rock group, is only singing to make money? What?!! And how are they not artistic? How are artists like Maroon 5 and Justin Bieber artistic, while fun. is the sell-out, awful group? That doesn't make one iota of sense!
And how are they awful? Seriously, what's so awful about them? What is SO bad about them that makes them unartistic and in it for the money? I know you can't answer this question because the reasoning behind it is stupid. Maybe it's because they're part of the indie/hipster genre, but then again everybody loves Arcade Fire and Mumford and Sons, and they're all basically one in the same. I just don't understand how they're not artistic or in it for the music.

They're songs are overplayed, darnit!
Adele, The Black Eyed Peas, Justin Timberlake, Maroon 5, and Kings of Leon (to name just a few) are all overplayed, but everybody LOVES them. This point is invalid.

Gotye
So who is Gotye? First of all, Gotye is one person, Wouter De Becker, a singer from Australia. He goes by the stage name Gotye, but he is a solo artist, not a group. He made it big last year too when his album "Making Mirrors" was slowly climbing the charts and his collaboration with Kimbra, "Somebody That I Used to Know", was also eating up the airwaves. Now, I'll first start off by saying the mainstream didn't fall in love with the original, stripped down song. No, they fell in love with the crappy dance-radio mix. The original song is beautiful: its simplicity and raw vocals make this song very artsy (and did you see that music video? awesome!!). Gotye and Kimbra are actually very good singers, and I thought people would love their shy yet powerful nature. But nothing seems to satisfy America because this song has also put Gotye and Kimbra in the line of harsh backlash. For some stupid and inexplicable reason, people were pissed off that "Somebody That I Used to Know" won Record of the Year and Best Pop Duo/Group performance. Why?!!! What is so bad about this song?

It's unoriginal, it's just "baa baa black sheep!"
Wow dude. Let me refresh everybody's memory with the fact that Flo Rida rips off other popular artists and nobody gets mad at him. Katy Perry ripped Ke$ha off by doing a carbon copy of "Tik Tok" with "California Gurls", but that didn't piss anybody off. And when Kelly Clarkson ripped off Beyonce's "Halo" with "Already Gone", nobody got mad at her. But when Gotye uses the baa baa black sheep motif, he's the copy cat...smh!! Also, that motif is only used to introduce and end the song, the blood and guts are completely original.

That's the only reason that I've heard for people hating this song so much. I mean, the fact that it was overplayed was a factor too, but as I said, so are alot of other songs by artists that are not singing for the sake of music. Gotye and Kimbra are genuine artists who just happened to have a smash hit, it's not their fault it got so popular. "Somebody That I Used to Know" is an awesome song, and I once again cannot understand why people don't like it.

Anyway, I'll end it here. If you still think that fun. and Gotye are just pop products, then you can just keep listening to Justin Bieber failing at a rap-love song, about how Juicy J and 2 Chainz can get "bandz  a make her dance", or how Drake and Lil Wayne have some how come up with a groundbreaking new phrase that's meant to justify all the stupid shit people do nowadays. Meanwhile, I'm going to put "Some Nights" and "Somebody That I Used to Know" on repeat and drown out the nonsensical rap and teeny pop of the mainstream.

Musical Dissection-Maroon 5

Welcome to a new segment called Musical Dissection, where I pick apart a certain artist or song and figure out how they went from being really good to really bad (or if they're just terrible in general). Today's victim: Maroon 5.

Maroon 5 is a case of they used to be good, but now they're shit. So, let's tear their carcus apart and see what went wrong.

It all started in 2007. They released their highly anticipated second album "It Won't Be Soon Before Long". It's lead single "Makes Me Wonder" was already the start of their transition into pop. It had this cool INXS 80s vibe to it, but it still was not as their previous hits. But it was inevtiably satisfying. I was just glad the band I fell in love with was still making music. Plus, the song became their first number one hit. But unfortunately, it was their only true hit off of their second album, as the other singles didn't make the top ten. They did a duet with Rihanna, yes, but they left as quickly as they re-appeared. They took a couple more years off and then in 2010 fired up again with "Misery". It was the first song off their third album "Hands All Over". This began their transition into being sell-outs, as the topless woman cover with hands all over her (funny, huh?...no) proves. Also, in the music video for "Never Gonna Leave This Bed", Adam decided to make love to his then-girlfriend in every scenery imaginable. Now, I know that he stripped naked back in the music video for "This Love", but back then he wasn't ruthlessly sexual about it.

...And then, just when you thought their antics couldn't get ANY worse, after Adam Levine took up a position on The Voice, they released "Moves Like Jagger". First off this will go into a side dissection, like while we're examining the body, this is the heart. This song was a career-pivoting moment because not only did they draft Christina Aguilera to sell the track, but they made a whole fucking song about Mick Jagger. Mick, fucking, Jagger. And then there's the stupid-ass music video, where Adam made it a regular thing to take his shirt off, and not to mention the music video has absolutely nothing to do with the message of the song. Adam is basically saying that he can fuck really well, but he compares his fucking style to Mick Jagger. Why?!! Mick Jagger is like 1000 years old, I'm sorry, but I think his fucking abilities have gone south for the winter, permanently. This song was basically the pinnacle of their desperation to sell themselves. It definitely worked, as the song sold 6 million copies in the US alone and spent five weeks atop the Billboard Hot 100. Although this success only came from the fact that Americans have shit for brains when it comes to music and they'll now buy anything that's overtly sexual or stupid. In just nine years they went from being a respectable rock group to a shitty pop group.

Come 2012, they continued the style of "Moves Like Jagger" and released "Payphone". Once again, it features Wiz Khalifa because they knew that if it didn't, nobody would buy this song. You see, it highlights how incredibly annoying and high pitched Adam's voice is. His voice is higher than Justin Timberlake's, and that's saying something. And come on, the song is about a fucking payphone (do those even exist anymore?). And of course, come the music video, Adam shows his muscles and throws in some shitty bank robbery, cop chase story for good measure. Wiz Khalifa's rap has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the song, but once again, he's there to sell the track. And it worked: "Payphone" sold 5 million copies in the US, despite peaking at number 2 behind the superior songs "Somebody That I Used to Know" and "Call Me Maybe". When "Payphone" died down, their next single "One More Night" proved to be the biggest pain in my ass yet. Mainly because, what's so appealing about it? There's no guest artist, the music video has Adam taking off his shirt again and by the way, just because he's swearing in his songs and plays the role of a boxer doesn't beef up his image in anyway. Adam Levine will always be a grade A pussy. But back to the point, "One More Night" is a reggae style pop song, so it should not have gotten that much airplay or sales because it's not even that overly catchy. But as always, America took a left turn and decided "Hey, this somewhat good song is worthy enough of being overplayed on the radio", and the song spent nine weeks atop the Hot 100. NINE!!!!! What the serious fuck people??!!! I am absolutely and completely disgusted that this piece of shit song, and fucking "Gangnam Style", kept the top two position for SEVEN weeks, keeping much better songs like "Some Nights" and "Ho Hey" from reaching the top. Seriously, it's moments like these that make me lose faith in pop music.

Now they have their latest song "Daylight" climbing up the charts. Really Maroon 5? You release a song called "One More Night" and then follow it up with "Daylight"?! How predictable can you be??! And even worse, this song is their biggest piece of shit yet, it has no musical merit and it's message is so overdone, it's like a children's song, but instead of it being guility enjoyable and timeless, it makes me want to gauge my eyes out with a seam-ripper. Maroon 5, why did you have to stoop so low to hyper-commercialized pop? You made me love you with great songs like "Harder to Breathe" and "She Will Be Loved", and then you took a monster-sized shit on them with the crap you're putting out now. And then to top it all off, I saw this photo of Adam Levine just a few weeks ago:

 

...WOW Adam, just...wow, not cool at all. You see, Maroon 5 aren't artists anymore, especially pricks like Adam Levine. They're just a sell-out pop product that has no artistic value anymore. And while their music videos for "This Love" and "She Will Be Loved" were very sensual, they were coy considering the way they (mostly Adam...of course) ruthlessly bare it all now. They're like a bottom-barrel porno, only made to please the lowest common denominator. Honestly, it's a damn shame that they decided to go down this road, and worst of all, their hearts aren't in it. That's what made their previous music videos so appealing, they were actually interested in the music they were making. And plus back then everything wasn't just about Adam. The other four members of Maroon 5 are now just for decoration as they're brought down into Adam's simpering sexuality.

Anyway, you've read me bitch long enough. I've dissected this thing and here's the Cause of Death:
Due to a crude lead singer and his overbearing thirst for the spotlight, Maroon 5 has died because of a pop overdose. And unfortunately, this disease has taken many victims, and I'm sad this had to be one of them. Bag it and tag it.

Grammys 2013-Review and Response

So the Grammys were yesterday. As always, Katy Perry needed to make the show all about her and wear a lime-green dress to show of her sweater-puppies. Oh well, at least JLo followed the rules and wore something a little more tasteful than she did the last time she was at the Grammys. But with all of the great (and not-so great) fashion aside, I have to say this year the ceremony was pretty good.

Starting with the opening...yeah, Taylor Swift, please don't ever EVER sing that song on stage again...ever! And LL Cool J's "big" finale was lame as hell, a very bad way to end the otherwise great ceremony. Most of my picks for each category won, and we saw some pretty kickass performances from Carrie Underwood, Kelly Clarkson, Miranda Lambert, The Lumineers, and all of the other performers who were not LL Cool J or Taylor Swift.

Now with the bulk of the show covered, let's get down to the actual awards part that took up 1/100 of the 3.5 hour show. The winners this year created one of the biggest polarized receptions I've ever seen this time of year. Fun won best new artist and song of the year for "We Are Young". On Facebook, reactions to this were either "what?! they are the worst band ever, the people who decided for them to win are deaf!" or "oh my god! fun. is the best band ever and I totally love them!" Personally, I think they deserved the awards they got, and I don't see how they're the worst band ever. "Some Nights" is a really great song, and yeah "We Are Young" was overplayed but it's still a good quality indie song. I just don't understand how people call them "unartistic" but at the same time call Maroon 5 a great band who's in it for the art of music. And that brings me to the next controversy: Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger" winning Best Pop Vocal Album and Maroon 5's "Overexposed" didn't. People were actually upset that Kelly won and Maroon 5 didn't. Are you fucking kidding me?! Kelly Clarkson 1) has a WAY better voice than Adam Levine's high-pitched whining, 2) is a TRUE pop artist, not a rock to pop crossover fail, and 3) is ACTUALLY in it for the music, not to sell out and make more money. "Stronger" is an excellent pop album and I was surprised it wasn't nominated for album of the year. If you don't like Kelly Clarkson, something is wrong with you and you need to see a proctologist A.S.A.P.

*Sigh* anyway, now on to who won Record of the Year. Gotye and Kimbra won this category with "Somebody That I Used to Know" as well as the Grammy for Best Pop Duo/Group performance. Once again, I do not understand why people don't like this song. It's ACTUALLY good (well at least the album version is, the radio mix sucks though), and Gotye and Kimbra are classically good singers. I'm sorry if this offends anybody, but they did deserve record of the year, it's understated yet appealing music is something quite rare in the mainstream today. Once again, I know it was overplayed, but that's because so many people requested it and liked it. Also, I will point out that Gotye is ONE person, not a group as so many people falsely believe. Anyway, kudos to Gotye, Kimbra, Kelly Clarkson, AND Fun for all of their wins.

Adele once again won Best Pop Solo Performance for "Set Fire to the Rain", which was an obvious win, that song is amazing! Carrie Underwood won Best Country Song and Best Country Solo Performance for "Blown Away", which I think she was worthy of, even if the song isn't pure country. Those are the awards that I cared the most about, so if you want to see the other winners you can go to Wikipedia or Grammy.com.

Anyway, I'll once again remind everybody that the Recording Academy decides the winners based on both quality and popularity, so they can appeal to the lowest common denominator and maintain the widespread appeal of the Grammys. It works, because it is the most tweeted music event of the year and is the highest honor you can get for music. I'm completely satisfied with the show last night, and I can't wait to see what next year has in store.

Oh, and "Babel" won Album of the Year, just in case you were wondering.

Funny Quotes from "Pitch Perfect"...Part 1

"Aca-scuse me?"

"You call yourself Fat Amy?"..."Yeah, so twig bitches like you don't do it behind my back"

"You're one of those aca-girls, I'm one of those aca-guys, and we're gonna have aca-children"

"Alright, hands in.........Hands in aca-bitches!!"

"I've been shot! I've just been shot! (with flying Mexican food)"

"I'm the best singer is Tasmania...with teeth"

"I have Bumper's number"..."Why do you have Bumper's number?"..."oh, well, ahhhhhhhhhh"

"We sing all over the world and compete in national championships"..."On purpose?"

"We perform at the Lincoln Arts Center you bitch!"

"We sing covers of songs without any instruments, it's all from our mouths!"..."Yikes..."

"No English...yes English? Just let me know where you're at, with English"

"So, how is the step monster?"..."No I don't actually care, I just wanted to say step monster"

"Amy, what are you doing?!"..."I'm horizontal running"

"I trust you will add your own cardio"..."Why cardio?"..."Yeah, don't put me down for cardio"

"If we let the Trebles penetrate us, we're giving them our power"..."Not a good enough reason to use the word penetrate..."

"I set fires to feel joy"

"I ate my twin in the womb"

"I think I have something that could help us out!"..."Woah bitch, no need to shout!"

"I think we all know where this is going...les-bi-anest"

"It all started when I broke up with my girlfriend"..."Whoomp! there it is!"

"And it opened up my eyes I saw the *baaarrrrfffffff*"

"And she had a week's worth of lunch and lost it"..."She didn't lose it, we know exactly where it is, it's all over the third row!"

"So I have a feeling, that we should kiss. Is that a good feeling or an incorrect feeling?"..."Well sometimes I feel like I could do crystal meth and then I think' umm, better not'"

Grammys 2013-Who Should Win

So, the 2013 Grammys are today, and during the 12-minute award giving out part of the three hour show, there's bound to be some odd wins. You see, the Grammys is an interesting ceremony because it's never easy to tell what exactly they're rewarding. Are they rewarding actual quality? or just popularity? Either way, every year it looks like the Recording Academy just gives out awards that will please the masses, but will also please the hipster/indie crowd, thus keeping the large interest that's had with the show. Sometimes this results in artists getting rewards they deserve, like Adele last year, who basically cleaned out the statue inventory. And other times, the most unlikely artist is rewarded, like Arcade Fire back in 2011 when they won album of the year. They've never charted in America, and internationally they've never even cracked the top 40, but somehow they maintained just enough visibility to get their album recognized. And I'm pretty sure they actually did deserve that award, since music now-a-days is getting pretty lame. But anyway, getting to the point of this post, I just wanted to share who I think should win the awards tonight. Obviously I can't share my picks for every single category, since there are like 75 of them, but I'll just give you the condensed version.

The Big Four

Record of the Year
Gotye and Kimbra-Somebody That I Used to Know

Song of the Year
Carly Rae Jepsen-Call Me Maybe

Best New Artist
fun.

Album of the Year
fun.-Some Nights

And finally, Pop

Best Pop Solo Performance
Adele-Set Fire to the Rain

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance
Florence + The Machine-Shake it Out

Best Pop Vocal Album
Kelly Clarkson-Stronger

Ok, I'll do other genres too...

Best Dance Recording
Swedish House Madia-Don't You Worry Child

Best Traditional R&B Performance
Beyonce-Love on Top

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration
Flo Rida and Sia-Wild Ones

Best Country Solo Performance
Carrie Underwood-Blown Away


So yeah, I can't wait to see the winners!! A full review of the show will come tomorrow.

Britney Spears-"Blackout" Review

What exactly happened to Britney Spears? Since the release of “In the Zone” in 2003, her life has been one tabloid disaster after another. From two marriages (both ending in divorce), two kids, and to top it off, a “comeback” performance that was the absolute nadir of career; there’s just been no break for our fallen pop princess. Maybe it was growing up too fast too soon, or maybe she was just given too much freedom, either way, post-“In the Zone” has not been kind to Britney. So, four years of mishaps and rehab stints later, we realize just how vital image is to pop stars. In 1999, we had a toned, tan, and fresh-faced school girl that pouted her way through “Baby One More Time”, and no more than a year later, we were given the red-suited Martian whose dance moves were almost as good as her command over teen boys. With every new album, there was a new image to accompany it. Pop stars like Madonna had already cemented the fact that image matters to music just as much (if not more) than the music itself, but not even Madge was so tightly-knit to her public persona as Britney has been. So, come 2007, when Britney has lost her coherence and that signature golden blonde hair, how does this new image hold up on “Blackout”? Well for starters, releasing it so quickly after that career-burning VMA performance and given Brit Brit’s erratic history, all of these events have set this album up to be (and arguably very well is) a train wreck. Upon the first listen you’ll notice two things: one, “Blackout” is shockingly cohesive, unlike the tattered singer behind it, and two, while this album is very much aware and club-ready, it still doesn’t retain the high standard so present in her past albums.    

From horrendous auto-tune to voice-altering no-nos, any talent that Britney has, both vocally and artistically, has been buried under the numerous producers that all have different visions, and more times than one, all these ideas don’t gel. Plus, the added product placements aren’t doing her any favors; since she’s at a point in her career where she needs to lay low, not celebrate her debauchery. But, as flawed as it is, “Blackout” also catches at sparse points of brilliance. For one, this is her first album that’s absent of dreary ballads, which keeps the momentum at a nice pace. Since her image has taken a downturn, she’s now not confined to squeaky clean and vapid pop. She can now explore a little, as Max Martin is still not around and instead she opts for urban producers such as The Neptunes, who craft the album’s slick and strong closer “Why Should I Be Sad?”, Bloodshy & Avant, among many, many others. With so many collaborations, they’re bound to hit the mark at one point. The album’s strongest track, the highly addictive and wonderfully satiric “Piece of Me”, was hemmed straight from B&A, while the following track “Radar” also shows a nice sexiness that defies Britney’s gaudy image. But, B&A are also responsible for the album’s lowest points: “Freakshow” is short, yet still runs past its playing time, and “Toy Soldier” seems pointless, never heading in any direction and makes it hard to continue to the rest of the album. But even with these tracks aside, there’s still plenty of fun to be had with the sultry opener “Gimme More” and the cool stripper anthem “Get Naked (I Got a Plan). All in all, “Blackout” plays like a triumph, since it is somehow more cleaned up and put together than the artist who’s on the album cover. But this also highlights its main flaw: the image supersedes the music. “Blackout” is an album to easily overpraise because of its contrast to Britney, the person. If she had recorded this a couple years ago, it wouldn’t have seemed to well-done. And at the end of the day, with no kind thank-yous in the liner notes, no sweetness, and no limit, this album is still not as good as its predecessor. It’s definitely her most unrestrained and fun album, yes, but that’s a fact that can only be appreciated, not loved.

Recommended Tracks in Bold:

1. Gimme More          2. Piece of Me            3. Radar

4. Break the Ice          5. Heaven on Earth     6. Get Naked (I Got a Plan)

7. Freakshow              8. Toy Soldier              9. Hot as Ice

10. Ooh Ooh Baby      11. Perfect Lover        12. Why Should I Be Sad?