So, before I reveal the best songs of 2012 on December 16 (the same day I will post the results of my survey, take it please!!), I think I should inform you about the worst this year had to offer. Now, it's been said plenty of times that each year is the worst year in music. It was said in 2010, 2011, and now 2012 has gotten that bad rep. But, as far as bad songs go, 2012 was actually on the milder side. I mean, there will always be horrid songs each year, whether it be in the 1980s, 1990s, 2000s, or now, some years are just worse than others. But, without further ado, please enjoy my angry humor on the absolute worst of 2012:
10. Victoria Justice-Make It In America
Okay, so we all know her as Tori of Victorious. This specific song was made for a TV special called "Tori Goes Platinium". Now, I already have a problem with every actress on the face of the planet thinking they have to do it all, act, sing, dance, make a fashion line, make a fragrance, and have her name slapped onto every McDonald's toy around the country, but I especially hate it when they actually can't do any of the things above. Victoria does not have a golden voice, and this song really just highlights her inexperience. When she has alot of drums, guitars, and backing vocals to drown out her voice, then she has a hit (see "Freak the Freak Out" and "Take A Hint", both are really good songs, not because she is a great singer), but songs like this, that just rely on her voice alone, really get irritating the first time you listen to it. The music itself is really generic, and there's really no message to it, just some chick wanting fame. Yeah, because you obviously don't have enough of it already.
9. Psy-Gangnam Style
Oh.My.God. I did it. I did the blasphemous thing by putting "Gangnam Style" on my worst of 2012 list. First of all, I really don't understand all the excitement around this song, you can only understand two phrases: "Gangnam Style" and "Hey Sexy Lady", the dances are actually pretty stupid, and the music is also just generic dance pop. LMFAO or Schwayze could have easily done this and there would have been virtually no difference. I find it absolutely appalling that this song and "One More Night" by Maroon 5 kept so many better songs from reaching number one ("Some Nights" by Fun being the most jipped). Some people have even compared this song to the "Macarena" by Los Del Rio. Not even. That song actually had words you could understand, everybody could do the dance and not feel silly, and plus the song is just so much better and far more catchy than this non-sense.
8. BOB and Taylor Swift-Both of Us
We get it B.o.B, you wanna make the world feel better about themselves. Seriously, we do not need song after song about this. "Airplanes" and "Nothin' on You", both released in 2010, clearly got your message acrossed. And the fact that Taylor Swift was drafted to accompany him just makes this song seem whiny and desperate instead of encouraging. Fortunately, if B.o.B keeps recycling the same old shit over and over, he will soon be erased from the radio because he will finally realize that we are over it.
7. One Direction-What Makes You Beautiful
I know this has been panned to death all year so I'll keep it short. One Direction is just another run of the mill boy band who sing about absolutely nothing but getting girls. We've had to endure this since the 1990s, but this song is really irritating because of its message. Basically saying "Hey you don't know you're pretty, and that's what makes you pretty" is not only confusing, but it's just plain silly. Last time I checked, when someone has poor self esteem even when they're drop dead gorgeous is annoying as fuck, not beautiful. I understand what the boys were trying to say, but it just comes across as cheesy pick-up lines that a 5th grader came up with.
6. PitBull-Back in Time
All this song says is "Back in Time" and "Baby, oh baby", with some non-sensical raps thrown in for shits and giggles. That's it. Can you even classify this as a song? Of all the repetitve shit that's come out within the past decade, nothing gets more repetitve than this. I really don't have much more to say because this non-song is so vapid I can't even make a healthy rant about it.
5. Justin Bieber and Big Sean-As Long As You Love Me
Yep, a Justin Bieber song made it onto my worst of 2012 list. Shocking I know. So the rason why this song is stupid is because it highlights just how un-talented of a singer he really is. He sounds so whiny and strained, like he's trying to give birth. And plus he's just singing about the SAME thing he always does. Apparentley it doesn't matter if they have a home or how poor/rich they are, as long as he is loved by his special girl everything will be alright. *Heavy sigh* This shit is getting really annoying and reptitive, remind me again on how he's still selling millions of records for essentially singing the same song over and over again?
4. Train-50 Ways to Say Goodbye
First off, I despise the whole latin feel they threw into this song. It's about as overdone and as generic as it comes, not to mention the whole latin blow-out of the 90s is over. Then, the song title doesn't really make sense with the song. He's trying to say goodbye, but yet he just tells lies about why she left? And apprently giving back everything he ever bought her is a way of saying goodbye? Plus, there aren't nearly enough "ways of saying goodbye" is this song, just lame-ass excuses for why he broke up with her, or why she left him, the song is still kind of confusing. I love Train, I really do, but their new stuff is just getting more and more tedious to listen to, and quite frankly, annoying.
3. Flo Rida-Whistle
THIS is the song that kept Ellie Goulding's "Lights" from reaching number one? America, WHAT IS WRONG WIT YA'LL??!!! I fucking hate songs that are so vulgar and single-entendred as this. Geez, I wonder what this song is about. Flo Rida wants a girl to blow his instrument used for giving military commands? No. He clearly wants a hoe to suck his dick. Or excuse me, blow his dick. I really don't care which genre it's in, or if a male or female is the one singing it, but even Flo Rida needs to know how appalling this is. And the only reason why this song isn't the worst song of 2012 is because it's undeniably and almost impossibly catchy (can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby...)
2. Justin Bieber-Boyfriend
Yup. Another Bieber song. He always has two songs on each of my annual worst of lists because he really is that bad. This song aggravates me because of the unrealistic expectations of men it gives 13 year old girls. When they listen to a song like this, coming from whatever boy band or teen heartthrob that throws some cliched lyrics with an even more cliched beat, they automatically assume that this is how men should be. When they grow up, and realize that no man is as perfect as Bieber makes it seem, they get all pissed off and then say that all guys are the same. And then they go one to say: "Why can't you be like Justin Bieber or One Direction??!!". Why? Because no man is going to dote on a woman hand and foot like they always proclaim. I'm sorry, if Justin Bieber was your boyfriend, he would probably see you as nothing more than a sex device that he can parade around at public events. Same thing with all the other male singers who sing about nothing except for how well he's going to treat a lady.
1. One Direction-One Thing
So, even though "What Makes You Beautiful" was very mundane and irritating, I still kind of liked it because it had a great hook. This song is just garbage. "I need that one thing, and you've got that one thing" What?! Are you fucking kidding me??! This song probably has the most simple and reptitive lyrical content ever released this year (even edging out Cher Lloyd's "Want U Back", which is actually catchy and will appear on my best of 2012 list), and not to mention the fact that this song and "What Makes You Beautiful" sound EXACTLY the same. Really, if you were to switch the music for both songs you wouldn't notice any difference. It's songs like this that make me lose faith in humanity. I was very pissed that One Direction got "Best New Artist" at the VMAs this year because they beat out Carly Rae Jepsen, Gotye, AND Fun. All of those artists at least vary their sounds and songs a tad so they're not so indistinct. All of One Direction's songs sound exactly the same, not to mention that they have absolutely no originality.
Anyway, I think you've had enough of my ranting, and I do not want to discuss this crap any further. Stay tuned on December 16 when you can douse your ears with the best of 2012. And as a little disclaimer: all songs made this list because I, and only I, found them to be the worst that this year had to offer. This does not mean that you shouldn't like them, if you do, that's fine. We all have our own opinions, this is just mine.
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